Doctor Who: The Question

We’ve got some catching up to do, so let’s get on.

While series 10 was airing, I had a random idea. Actually it’s an idea I’ve carried in my head for years: a lipdub of sorts to the Timelords’ ‘Doctorin’ The TARDIS’. You remember, the two blokes who went on to form KLF, after they’d finished being the Justified Ancients of Mu Mu, which is sort of the same thing but not quite. Because the words ‘Doctor Who’ get used an awful lot, don’t they? Particularly since Moffat took over. I used to think it was just a way of including cheap, reliable humour: a drinking game trope, a thing for the clip files. Until Missy got hold of the joke and basically killed it, which now makes me wonder whether the chief writer was trolling the fanbase since the beginning.

Anyway, the idea was this: scenes from Doctor Who synced to the lyrics from Drummond and Cauty’s jaunty masterpiece, with a few Daleks added for good measure. Throw in a bit of dancing and Bob Holmes is your uncle. Plus the KLF are supposedly returning in some form in August, which makes it topical. But there are other ‘Doctorin’ mashups on YouTube, and although none of them really come close to the particular vibe I wanted, some of them are nonetheless very good.

So it became an idea that evolved. Which is when I remembered Rory delivering a message and a question to the Cybermen, in the same series that we also have The Question. You know, the one that should never be asked because it’s incredibly dull. And the rest was easy. Bill does not come out of it well, but she’s off travelling the universe with watery tart; I do not think she’s in a position to complain.

Musically, I shopped around for a bit to find one of those random, rights free dance instrumental tracks that would work. You know, like something by 2 Unlimited, or that Spankox one, ‘To The Club’, which was playing on Italian radio stations when Emily and I honeymooned in Liguria way back in 2004. In the end, it was Edward’s insistence on watching (and rewatching, and rewatching again) the Japanese guy singing about his pen and pineapple that did it. You just need a decent karaoke version and a general sense of stupidity. Fortunately I am blessed with both.

Besides, it gives me another excuse to show this.

I’m somewhat mortified after the fact that I got the lyrics wrong; it should be ‘I have’ rather than ‘I got’, but for the sake of scholarly integrity it stays as is. These things matter, dammit.

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